


Home

by MortisBane



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: Rebels, Star Wars: Thrawn Series - Timothy Zahn (2017)
Genre: M/M, Thrawn Treason plot mentioned, between Jedi Night and Family Reunion and Farewell
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-06
Updated: 2019-01-06
Packaged: 2019-10-05 17:02:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17328977
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MortisBane/pseuds/MortisBane
Summary: Called back to Coruscant once again, Thrawn has to watch from afar how Lothal crumbles from his grasp with his absence.  Director Krennic breathing down his neck and Eli Vanto delivering him graver news from the Unknown Regions has Thrawn stretched thin.  And for once, he knows not what to do.





	Home

“You can’t keep going like this.” The voice over the holoprojection, thick with accent and stumbling over their Cheunh words did little to put his nerves at ease. Especially knowing that they were right. But the voice at least bloomed pleasant feelings deep in his chest. Lifting his chin from where it rested on his steepled hands, Thrawn looked at the small blue figure displayed at his desk.

Not even a full rotation he had been away from Lothal. In less than half a rotation everything he’d strived so hard for, all his work, all his progress, were erased in an instant. News reached him swiftly, of the shut down of his Tie Defender factory. Quickly after that, it’s cause, Pryce’s own incompetence, firing on their own fuel depot...Thrawn audibly groaned, alone in his office, the only eyes on him he felt secure in allowing them to see.

The transmission between Pryce and Rukh had just come to an end, and his emotions were so raw. The line had nearly been crossed, where he would have succumbed to his boiling rage, but thankfully he kept it in check. Pryce still looked thoroughly terrified, which isn’t what he wanted. When under pressure, she makes emotion fueled poor decisions. First at Botonn, then again over Atollon, and now on Lothal. The civilians, his fleet and the rebels, and now his Tie Defender. That woman, despite all her cunning, had a knack for ruining his plans.

“You haven’t slept, have you?” The hologram called out again, voice Empathetic, knowing. Thrawn wanted to smile, a bittersweet feeling souring his mouth. Eli Vanto, his former aid, his forever friend, watched him through the holoprojector, blue hues obscuring some of his features. Not all, Thrawn noted, pleased that Eli hadn’t relented to Chiss regulations regarding his hair. Eli had initiated contact not long after he received word of the situation on Lothal, baring even graver news. Stress had never been an unmanageable thing to him before, but now, more than ever, he felt the strain of it all.

Eli was right, they both knew it. While Chiss didn’t need as much sleep as Humans, he did still require it. But even before leaving Lothal, he’d allow his sleep schedule to suffer. The Rebels, controlling Pryce, fighting for the Tie Defender, he was stretched thin and needed as many hours in each day as he could get. He hadn’t slept since two cycles ago, and that was barely two hours. It didn’t show to his subordinates, but Eli knew better. Not only knew sleep deprivation on Chiss, but also just knew him.

“Important matters have deemed sleep irrelevant.” He answered, sighing out the Cheunh. Eli gave him a disapproving look and Thrawn averted his gaze.

“Just listen to yourself. Weren’t you the one who always made me get an ‘adequate amount of sleep each night, Cadet Vanto’?” He raised his arms, in a mock replication of Thrawn. Stars, how Eli would struggle, no matter how slightly, with Cheunh was oh so endearing.

“Perhaps I have become a bit hypocritical in your absence.” He rested his chin back on his steepled fingers, this time directing all attention to Eli’s holo. The lack of sleep was beginning to weigh on him.

“Kryat spit!” Smiles tugged at each of their lips, any spite in his words nullified.

“I’ve missed you.” He said it, perhaps to the shock of them both, but he knew it was true. Without Eli, everything has been harder to overcome. Even as a Grand Admiral, the prejudices never ceased, his worth measured only by his successes. As soon as Eli left, Thrawn was truly alone. No true friends, and few allies. There was Yularen, an ally to be sure, but friends? Thrawn didn’t believe they were. And he was fully aware that, to Pryce, he was just a tool to be used. She may believe she is using him, how wrong she is.

But Eli, he was everything. An ally, a student, a second opinion, a new angle, a friend. Maybe more. Standing on the bridge, without Eli by his side, reciting information, asking his input, or explaining his own thoughts, it was hard. The silence was unnerving, the lack of a form beside him, something he’d grown so accustomed to. Just gone, and replaced by false faces and incompetent fools.

Eli smiled at him, a look of pity reflecting across his features. He raised his hand to the holoprojector, as if waiting for Thrawn to meet it in a greeting. He raised his own arm to mirror the gesture.

“I’ve missed you too.” It was whispered, as if Eli feared being discovered. A secret just for the two of them. Sending Eli away was both the smartest and hardest decision Thrawn has ever made. “You should consider what I’ve told you.” Eli’s learned well, both in his time with Thrawn, and with his people. To see when Thrawn’s most vulnerable. He dropped his hand, laying both on his desk, wanting nothing more than to just lay his head down and slip into unconsciousness.

“It isn’t that simple, Eli.” He ran his fingers over each other, feeling the edges of his fingernails. He was nervous. The realization came suddenly, and unwarranted. He hadn’t felt the need to fidget since he was a child.

“You know I know this. That’s why I say consider, we need you, He needs you. The Empire, they’re beyond help!”

“That has yet to be seen.” Thrawn didn’t try to meet Eli’s eyes, he knew what he’d see. The Human groaned, hologram moving around in his peripheral.

“Open your eyes Thrawn! You're blinding yourself, so focused on this mission, that you’re forgetting the bigger picture. You did this with Nightswan, you’ve become obsessed with these Rebels.”

Was that true? Maybe. But maybe not. If he could convince the Emperor of the threat these Rebels pose, maybe his Tie Defender could fall back into his favor. Receive extra funding from him personally, and he could get it all back on track. Remove Pryce from office, sweep the Rebels from the entire system. Then, having proven the worth of his project, maybe all this Stardust business could be laid to rest. Then the Empire could be a force useful to the Ascendancy.

“You’re doing it now.” Eli’s voice softened again, sympathy overtaking frustration. “You’re trying to convince yourself, but you know I’m right. The Empire is too far gone, there’s nothing you can do to bring it back.”

“Eli, I am on Coruscant to do exactly that. To convince the Emperor the importance and superiority of my project over Director Krennic’s. I even have Tarkin’s own personal support. There certainly still is a chance.”

“You’re also there to prove your loyalties yet again. We both know it. They don’t trust you, and probably never will. If there was hope for your Tie Defender, it would have been assured with Lord Vader’s own support. The very fact that it’s in question yet again only proves there’s no getting to the Emperor.” His brows drew together. “You know this.” And he did. But he was given a task, and he has, as of yet, failed to complete it. Leaving it undone is not something he can easily do.

“You know how my people are, Eli. I have set out to accomplish something.”

“And you won’t rest until you do, yadda yadda. You already know how much I think this determination is toxic and archaic. Thrawn, he’s your brother. These Grisk, they’re threatening to kill him until they speak with you, and only you. Your own blood kin must take some sort of precedence!”

He did, and it was tearing Thrawn up inside. His brother or his mission. His people or his Empire. Victory or Eli. In a perfect world, he could have it all. The Victory, his brother safe, Eli at his side. But he couldn’t and under no scenario could he have it all. He knew this. Knew it all too damn well.

“I’ve never not known what to do Eli.” He admitted, his confident self assured voice so quiet, he wasn’t sure the Human heard him. But he did.

“You still have a place in the Ascendancy.”

“Things have become more complex. The Emperor’s interest in Lothal has grown, the Jedi Temple, and the Jedi child Ezra Bridger...I worry he is more invested than ever before, meaning his eyes on me have doubled as well.”

During their first meeting upon Thrawn’s arrival, all he did was ask about the Jedi, mentioning again and again their importance to him. He barely got to mention the Tie Defender until half the meeting had gone by. The Emperor’s interests were very single minded. While he wanted the Rebel threat dealt with in that sector of space, he was certain it was because of these Jedi. He was losing his hold over Lothal, losing his own control over his own plans. Each day that passed he was farther and father from control, soon, he’d have nothing.

“Thrawn. The Empire is lost, your mission is lost.” Eli sighed, Thrawn glancing at him and he saw how he wrapped his arms around himself. “Thrawn, come home, please, we need you more here than over there.”

Home. He hadn’t thought the Ascendancy as his home in a long time. Back as a child, living impoverished, his only home was Thrass. And even after being adopted into the Eighth Ruling Family, he was an outsider, one who stuck out and couldn’t conform, all he had was Thrass. Maybe that’s why leaving had been so easy, he never had a stable place to call home, just a brother, one who would always be in his heart. But then there was Eli, the one factor in this entire foreign space that made him feel normal, as if he did fit somewhere in this mess of a xenophobic Empire. He sent that away too.

If Thrawn had a home, it was there, with Thrass and with Eli. He wanted to feel as if he belonged somewhere again. Not feel like he was fighting again and again against a force that was meant to be on his side, for which he fought for. Not to be passed around wherever he could help the next Imperial, a tool-no a toy-passed about incompetent toddlers until their problems went away. He’d done that enough before coming here. This Empire was never on his side, even when he was on it’s, and Eli was right, it was too far gone.  
Leaving wouldn’t be a simple feat. Numerous individuals had their eyes on him at any given moment. Judging, silently waiting for any slip up to report to the Emperor. He wasn’t blind to their presence, well aware of the Empire’s spies. Commodore Faro had even brought some to his attention. She, she was an ally, and maybe even one day could have been a friend.

He looked back at Eli, he looked hopeful, no doubt noticing how Thrawn was debating what he said. He must realize he was winning. Not prepared to voice his thoughts just yet, Thrawn stopped to take in Eli’s appearance. He looked good in Chiss attire. The Defense Fleet uniform, one Thrawn knew well, fit well to his form. The tight outfit with sleek designs built not only for easy movement, but a strong regal appearance. And Eli wore it well. While Thrawn did prefer Eli’s civilian attire, especially those of Lysatran design, seeing the Human in his people’s clothes made him happy beyond measure. It looked much better than an Imperial Uniform.

“It would still be a few days before I would be able to leave safely.” He began, sitting up straighter in his chair, not missing how Eli’s face lit up.

“We can hold out. Have this long, and have been given a decent window to present you by.” Eli replied, voice much more energetic than before.

“I will more than likely need to return to Lothal, to keep up appearances. Do what I can to quiet the Rebels enough that I could leave without much notice until it was too late. And then the travel there would take some time.” The more he spoke, the wider Eli’s grin grew, the more and more real his answer was becoming. He was conceding, he was going to return, bring Thrass back, repel the Grisk, for a time at least. He was going to see Eli again.

“To see you again, it would be worth any wait.” There was an implication there, Eli was leading to something, Thrawn raised his brow. “The time apart, I’ve had plenty of time to think. I have a proposition for you when you return. One you don’t have to say yes to, but I feel like you might.”

“And that proposition is?”

“Something I can only reveal in person, so you better make it back!” They shared a smile.

“I shall then.” A dangerous thought filtered through Thrawn’s mind. Feeling like he would go to any lengths to have Eli smile like that. But it was true. The grin pulled his lips thinner, pushing his cheeks up and ending in tiny dimples. The small feature somehow would brighten his entire face, and Thrawn regretted the hologram couldn’t display Eli in all his glory. It wouldn’t be able to hold a candle to the real thing.

“I’m sorry Thrawn. I know how it must be to abandon you mission, but I’m so glad you’ve come around. You’re needed much more here, by the Ascendancy, by Thrass...by me.” The sentence finished off quieter than the rest, but the meaning was all there. He had a good idea on what Eli’s proposition may be upon his return, if not, he had one of his own.

“I am eager to have you by my side once again, Eli Vanto.” The silence between them lingered, eyes locked in a comfortable moment of bliss.  
His datapad chimed, a notification popping up over all the reports he had been reading through about Lothal. Director Krennic was requesting entry to his office. Thrawn sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose.

“Duty calls?” Eli asked, looking at him very knowingly.

“No rest for the Grand Admiral.” Thrawn agreed, mood souring. Krennic was an insufferable man with barely any holdings on his own emotions. Quick to anger, and not afraid to voice his frustrations. He reminded Thrawn of a Human toddler, throwing tantrum when the Emperor didn’t give his project his full attention.

“I’ll leave you to your work. But Promise me you will sleep tonight, I don’t care how long just do it!” Thrawn chuckled lightly, not really a laugh, but close enough that Eli got the intent.

“I promise Eli.”

“And stay in touch, keep me updated!”

“I shall.” He moved, ready to terminate the secure connection, as well as accept Krennic’s entrance request. “Farewell Eli Vanto, I await our reunion.”

“Until then Thrawn.” Just before the connection ended, Eli whispered a final Cheunh phrase, just in time as his form fizzled away. This phrase was a specific one, meant to convey emotions of strong importance. Not of friends, or close allies, but that of a deep emotional connection, a familial connection without actually being family. As close to basic as he could get, Eli just called him, love?

The Director strolled into his office, his flashy white cape billowing behind him as he walked. Barely through the door and he was already talking, listing off all sorts of reasons why Stardust dwarfed his Tie Defenders in importance. Thrawn threaded his fingers together on his desk and settled in for a long talk. All the while, in the back of his mind, Eli’s words echoed, keeping his spirits high.

The next three days passed by in a flurry of chaos. Meetings, debates, and numerous fights between Krennic and himself. Poised in front of the Emperor like children being chastised, all the while encouraged to tattle on one another. Thrawn despised it all. Inefficient, wasteful, time that could have been spent getting Lothal back under control. From what he’s heard back from Rukh, things have only been getting worse. Rebels more embolden. Attacking Rukh himself, the Jedi Temple. The Temple he heard from the Emperor himself during another meeting, the fact worked as a good point to push for his Tie Defenders. But it was all useless.  
By the second meeting, Thrawn realized these were all for the Emperor’s benefit, maybe even enjoyment. His mind was made up, with how production was halted so suddenly, Stardust would win out. It was no secret how much the Emperor adored the project, Thrawn barely stood a chance. This was all a test for him, to see how he would react to the loss of his own project. To see the project he personally opposed win out in the Empire’s favor. His actions here afterwards were yet another loyalty check, just as Eli said. Too bad it was already too late for them.

The first wrench in his plans was the Emperor’s continued interest in the Jedi, Ezra Bridger. Despite his refusal to continue the Tie Defender project, he still needed Thrawn. Needed to use him to get the Jedi into his hands. So now he was in a position to deal in total the Rebels on Lothal, but he had the Emperor’s presence and personal underlings keeping tabs on him. Slipping away unnoticed became harder.

So instead, he just followed orders. Did as the Emperor instructed, firing on the city, though directing as much of the damage to the least populated areas, or places he knew should be uninhabited. Keep face through the whole scenario, keep suspicions down. Though he did receive odd looks from Faro before she excused herself from the bridge. He hoped there were no civilian casualties, but he knew the likelihood of that being the truth were slim. Though it worked, and the boy came right to them. That was one requirement of him taken care of.

His second order, to continue firing on the city, turn the city to ash, leave no building standing. That was harder to follow. The city couldn’t have evacuated, innocents would be slaughtered, but he had to follow orders. He had to appease the Empire, just do this and he can atone for his sins by joining the fight to keep the entire galaxy safe. But as the city’s defense shield came back online, he was both relieved and enraged. This wasn’t the smooth return to control he had hoped for.

From there, everything divulged into further chaos. Rukh was gone, his most trusted ally in the entire Empire, snuffed out in seconds. And the boy, made it all the way to his bridge, fighting through not only his staff but the Emperor's own trusted guard. He oozed confidence, purpose, he knew exactly what he was doing, and positive he would do it. Then the Purgill. The creatures coming from seemingly nowhere, a hoard of them, ranging so far in size, for a few moments, he was truly shocked still. And it dawned on him. This was it. He wasn’t going to sweep over and set Lothal upright again. It was lost to him, just like the Empire was lost to him, and judging by the next string of events, so was the Ascendancy.

He fought, of course he did, wouldn’t go down without a fight. Thrawn wasn’t one to give in. Give up hopeless endeavors, perhaps, but to give in, he refused. Some mixture of his own personality, and his Chiss pride. Which made the taste of defeat all the more bitter on his tongue. The cold embrace of these creatures tentacles squeezing the last bits of hope from him. This was his end, his death or his disappearance, the difference was minute at this point.

His final thoughts drifted to Eli. That final smile, the quiet promise left on his lips. He wouldn’t get to see him again. He couldn’t stop this from happening, no matter how much he struggled, no matter how much he tried to think his way around it. He was trapped. Trapped in a place where his brother was a prisoner of war, where Eli would be waiting for him forever. Where he’d taken innocents for no reason, caused deaths of those who didn’t deserve it, and all of it for nothing. He watched the sky before them fall away, the all too familiar streaks of hyperspace preparing to blast them away, and he slid his eyes closed. Come now what may.

**Author's Note:**

> Look my own idea, I did it! Guess this is my take on what Thrawn is feeling at the end of Rebels season four, and my idea on what help Eli and the Ascendancy might need from Thrawn in Treason. Really just kinda came up after watching the rest of Rebels season four, hope you all enjoyed. This will probably be my last update for some time, maybe not, but when I come back I should have something big!
> 
> Stay Wizard  
> ~Mortis


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